Lessons from Kim: The Power of Speaking at the Right Pace
- How to spot when your natural speaking pace doesn’t match your listener
- Why adjusting your speed helps people feel more clear, comfortable, and confident
- Simple ways to match someone’s rhythm without sounding fake or losing your style
Good communication isn’t just about what you say.
It’s about how people feel when they hear it.
The Art of Speaking at the Right Speed: A Lesson from the Client Floor
Kim Jenkins prided herself on her quick mind. As a senior consultant at ClarioMark Partners in Raleigh, she could break down tough trademark cases in minutes. Her words came out fast, sharp, and packed with insights.
It worked—until the day it didn’t.
The High-Stakes Meeting
On a hot September morning, Kim walked into a big meeting. She was pitching a trademark strategy to a new client—a family-owned manufacturing company.
This wasn’t just any meeting. If all went well, this could be one of the firm’s biggest accounts.
Sitting across from her was Robert, the company’s founder. He was 68, calm, and known for being thoughtful and careful. He spoke slowly, chose his words, and paused often.
Kim started fast. She ran through complex filing options, legal risks, and strategies like she always did—smooth and quick. She noticed Robert leaning in, eyes squinting, brow tight. To her, that meant he was engaged.
Twenty minutes in, Robert raised a hand.
~ “Ms. Jenkins,” he said, slow and steady. “I’m having trouble following. Can you… slow down?”
Kim froze. She’d missed it. He wasn’t nodding along. He was struggling to keep up.
The Wake-Up Call
After the meeting, Robert’s team asked for time to “digest the information.”
Back in the break room, Kim sat slumped in a chair. Her teammate Jason, from Client Relations, had watched the whole thing.
“Rough one?” he asked, pouring coffee.
“I think I lost them,” she said. “Robert looked confused halfway through.”
Jason nodded. “He’s sharp. But he processes things slower. He wants time to think before deciding.”
Kim thought back. The way Robert spoke. The way he paused. It was all there—she just didn’t catch it.
“I should’ve noticed,” she said. “He’s careful with every word.”
“It’s about rhythm,” Jason said. “Some clients want speed. Others need space to think. He’s the latter.”
Trying Again—At the Right Speed
Later that day, Kim asked for a second meeting. But this time, she did her homework. On a quick scheduling call with Robert, she listened closely to how he spoke. His slow pace. His clear pauses. His habit of repeating key points.
The next meeting felt different from the start.
Kim slowed down. She paused after each major point. She asked,
“Does this approach fit your business model?”
And she waited.
Robert nodded. He relaxed. He asked more questions. He even smiled when she explained a tricky licensing issue.
By the end, his legal team was scribbling notes. Robert was already talking about timelines.
“This is exactly what we needed,” he said. “Thanks for walking us through it.”
A New Habit Forms
That meeting changed Kim’s approach.
From then on, she started watching how clients spoke from the very first hello. If someone talked fast and made quick decisions, she kept her natural pace. But if they paused often or asked clarifying questions, she slowed down.
Jason put it well:
~ “When you match someone’s pace, you don’t just help them understand—you show respect.”
It’s not about sounding smart. It’s about making it easy for people to hear you.
Lessons from the Field
Kim’s shift taught her a lot. Here are the big takeaways:
- Watch First, Speak Second
Before you dive in, notice how the other person talks. Are they quick? Do they pause? Their style tells you how to respond. - Matching Isn’t Mimicking
Kim didn’t fake it. She just adjusted. A pause here, a slower sentence there. She stayed herself—just more aware. - One Size Doesn’t Fit All
In big meetings, she aimed for a moderate speed. That way, everyone could follow. But in one-on-ones, she matched the other person. - Look for Signs
Confused faces. Repeated questions. Shuffling or fidgeting. Those are all signs to slow down.
On the flip side—tapping fingers, finishing your sentences? Time to speed up.
The Payoff
Six months later, Kim’s client ratings were way up. Conversations felt easier. Clients understood more, asked better questions, and trusted her more.
Robert’s company? They became one of ClarioMark’s biggest accounts. He even referred Kim to other business owners.
At a year-end dinner, he pulled her aside.
~ “You didn’t just explain things well,” he said. “You made it easy for me to get it. That’s what made you stand out.”
Kim now uses this approach with everyone—clients, teammates, even friends. What started as a mistake turned into one of her most powerful skills.
Because speaking well isn’t just about facts or speed. It’s about helping others feel seen, heard, and understood.
And sometimes, that means slowing down—not because you know less, but because you care more.
Core Insights
- Pacing shapes perception
Talk too fast and you overwhelm. Talk too slow and you bore. Get the pace right, and your message lands. - Adaptation beats imitation
You don’t need to copy anyone. Just adjust your speed enough so they stay with you. - Trust flows at their speed
People listen more when they feel respected. Matching pace shows you’re paying attention.
Quick Checklist: How to Match Speaking Pace
- Watch their rhythm before you speak
Do they speak fast? Slow? Pause a lot? Match that. - Start in the middle
If you’re unsure, go with a clear, calm pace. Shift up or down as needed. - Pause with purpose
After big points, let your words sink in. Don’t rush the silence. - Use body language cues
Brow furrowed? They might be lost. Tapping fingers? You may be dragging. - Follow up their way
For deep thinkers, send a short written summary. For quick movers, keep it brief and action-focused.
FAQ: The Power of Pace at Work
Q: Isn’t fast talking a sign of confidence?
A: Not always. Speed can show energy—but only if your audience can follow. Real confidence is helping others understand.
Q: What if I get it wrong?
A: No big deal. Just watch for signs. If they look confused, slow down. If they drift off, pick up the pace. Adjusting shows awareness.
Q: Do I have to change my style?
A: You don’t have to, just tweak the tempo. A pause or slower line won’t make you less you—it makes you more clear.
Q: Is this just for clients?
A: Not at all. This works in team meetings, reviews, pitches—anywhere you talk with people. Matching pace builds better conversations everywhere.